Lately, I have been noticing habits and wondering anew about them. Vitamins….they have been a hit and miss experience for me. I do not like take capsules and often feel like I am gagging to get them down. I have sourced more liquid forms and that works better for me. Though now the cod liver oil liquid is leaving a burning feeling in my throat. Ah, I am a sensitive flower. But….do I feel better having taken vitamins? Truly I do not notice a difference in my energy or being. If I did, it would be more compelling to continue but now I am left pondering. Is this another thing that we have been told is necessary and perhaps is not? So, I will finish what I have and wait to see if I feel different. My sense is that our bodies can heal themselves, keep themselves running perfectly as we move closer to our true frequency. Of course, we live in a world that is full of toxins and elements that actively work against that innate health. Yet, our beliefs are a large part of experiencing radiant health. I can choose to hold a vision of myself shining with energy and vitality.
Exercise, a hit and miss event for me also. At times, it feels fun and right. Days like today, it feels that if I were an engine, its plug has been pulled and all the oil has run out. Exercise, even a walk. feels foreign. Deep rest, perhaps time in front of the sauna lights in my closet, and that makes a day. Trusting that my body can maintain its health without a schedule or routine as both go by the wayside for me. I know this, I have lived this way for years yet interesting how when I have a run of a few days in a row, I start to make a story about what I need to do. I have marked it on the calendar….starting a list of days and then felt bad when a number of days have disappeared without having done anything physical. How is this helping me? It is not. So, I am letting go of that way of being. I have done this time and time again. It makes me smile at my tender self. How dear we are, wanting to do the right thing, follow the script, get our gold star. I was such a kid, wanting to get all A’s in school, wanting to do all that was expected at home to get the approval of my parents. I return once again to trusting the energy flow and my body to lead me. It is then a joy filled experience each time I engage.
It feels that we are walking deeper into the dream. Time dissolves and if not for my phone’s alarm, I would not show up when it is important to do so. I have started to label the alarm so that when it chimes, I can read what I intended for myself as that might have flown out of my mind. An hour can pass in a moment, days in hours. I am often shocked at how much time passes and I have been elsewhere in my being. I am floating in the dreamtime while awake. More and more the night and day blend into one another. The delineations are dissolving taking us with them. It is so interesting to be aware of this while living it.
The grandchildren and adult kids are anchors, keeping me tethered to this reality. I am grateful for them. As I am grateful for the dreamy floating feeling. I can get lost in a flower or a view or simply the space around me. Coming back due to someone at the door, calling, “Nana!” can be a jarring experience at times. Other times, the popping back and forth comes with ease. Simply a turning of my head to view this reality and then another. All laid out, like bands of color in a rainbow yet fluid. It gets more difficult to find the words that express the experience.
LIght language flows freely, perhaps it is the frequency where sound holds so much more meaning than our minds can process or interpret. When friends and I engage in allowing that language to come forth, there is understanding but not one that we can put into words. Our inner being takes it in and our bodies feel it. Like listening to whales and dolphins..their sounds penetrate another stratum of my being. It feels good to my body. Sound is so powerful and we are only beginning to understand how it can benefit us.