Turning My Heartlight On

The photo shows how the flowers are meant to express the painting. Tall, elegant bouquet of white to go with the elegant lady in white. How fun is that! Imagine a whole exhibit!

Interesting day. I began by attending the 7am Spiritual Warrior class at the local yoga studio. I was the only student. The instructor and I chanted through our chakras and meditated. I felt peace and joy. He said that he had spent the last 25 years with his guru and was now taking this information out into the world. He said a few things that did not resonate with me, about asking for the light to descend and how his guru could do that but others might not. I said, “We can all invoke the light. We call it forth as we are masters.” He invited me to a retreat with his other classes this weekend for the full moon and equinox. I had put out the intention of wanting to gather with others this weekend so I was interested that this invitation came to connecting with other like minded souls. The guru aspect felt old to me which seems to have the effect of making me tired. Ah, a good clue when I am in old energies.

I had a lovely conversation with my elder son about the feelings of joy and well being that we were both experiencing. He was finalizing his leave from his job to have time to be in nature and attune more to this next phase of who he is and what he is called to. He is a druid of old and feels the nature spirits calling him. We both felt high from our conversation. He was delighted how the universe was supporting him to make this move by providing a partially paid leave of absence for a period of months. He was full of gratitude and excitement. He could now be fully engaged in his new role on the planet.

Read of earthquake being predicted for this weekend in California. I live in San Francisco so it comes close to home. Feeling the intense energies coursing through my body, need for extra food, rest. Anxiety, head, body pressure had been building. Yet, this overwhelming feeling of well being coursing through me. Knowing that I came here for this time, to be a force of calm and peace. To be the still point. Knowing that it would never be as hard or as lonely again. That despite earth changes, we were out of the density and moving into oneness. A sense of elation at that thought. A feeling that I am in my right place and prepared for what is to come.

Instructor from class this a.m. stating that the heart chakra of the planet had been moved from India to the West Coast of North America. Recalling being given the message in Sedona that I was to head to San Francisco to connect a heart line with my daughter and a friend to Hawaii and Mount Shasta. Told that my daughter was one anchoring the heart in San Francisco. When I was shown on my travels that I was free to once again return to the west coast, I heard; “Flow the rivers of forgiveness along the coast to hold it.”

I was to meet a friend to visit a museum to see an exhibit of floral designs created to match some of the paintings. Truly a special exhibit. I watched myself do some unusual things: get in for free by posing as this friend’s wife at his behest, leave earlier than I wanted to as the others wanted to go, and eating lunch in a dark interior space when my soul was craving the sun outdoors. Observing.

Had a walk in the park and was very tired when I arrived home. I had a fun phone conversation with a friend who loves to play and dance with the energies. She said something that resonated again for me: “I am done learning things. I am here to play and dance and breathe.” I know that it is in being in my joy, that I am of the most service to life. My heart has been on fire these past couple of days. an almost exquisite pain. It is so present in my chest, heartlight. I am learning to shine my heart light! That phrase has been with me as my inner theme song for about a year now. I created a piece of art around this theme. Now I am actually experiencing it!

I watched some sense of judgment appear about how I had conducted my day. “How could you get out of alignment so quickly! You have to tune in to you, no one else’s agenda.” I watched these thoughts arise. Felt them go through me, recognized them as thoughts, not who I am and let them go. The whole day felt dreamy to me, like I was being led along with almost no will of my own, carried on some stream. Again, I observed all this like a spectator.

Saw my daughter for a few moments before she was heading off for a long weekend. She was feeling very anxious. We talked about grounding, staying in her heart and taking very good care of herself, nurturing herself. Quiet evening with my younger son. We had pizza and cookies and watched a funny movie. We talked about pulling back some of his energy from work to focus on his creative endeavors. Reflected back his own power and influence to him and why his boss might feel threatened by his creativity. Spoke of his movement from the 40 hour a week to fewer hours as a transition into the life he is dreaming into being. Fun to then read an article on empowerment from Steve Rother and the group that he channels. http://lightworker.com/beacons/2011/2011_03-Empowerment.php

that was very powerful for me. It spoke of stepping out of duality this equinox. We are in a new time, being birthed as new beings. We have lived in this duality for so long. It spoke of polarity and how if I have a strong belief about what is good, then in that, I am activating what is evil. They are the extremes on a continuum. I have been observing myself feeling neutral about all the happenings in the world. I do not watch the news or videos of Japa
n or anywhere else so the images are not in my mind. I wondered at myself, was my compassion gone? Yet, I can stand embracing Japan and shine my heartlight and know that it is a searchlight, it is an immense power. It has moved me to tears and to awe. The activation asked us to accept Lucifer into our hearts and thank him for his role in creating the duality that allowed us to believe in our separation from Source. He and Archangel Michael are brothers who played the opposite ends of the continuum, the light and the dark, and are now merging as we embrace unity consciousness. This took a few inbreathes to absorb yet I knew it as truth. I surrendered my limiting beliefs and watched as so much came up to be released.

This new way of seeing the world, through the lens of neutrality is exciting something in my core. I feel the vibration of the truth of it for me. So if I am not radiating peace, as I do not want to activate its opposite, war, what am I doing? How do I drop my old programming? There is only one answer. It is love. I am love. There is no opposite to love. I do not have to send light, I do not have to send healing. I do not have to figure it out. It is so simple it makes me laugh!
I am love. I go inward and connect to my Mother/Father God and their heart. I am a cell in that heart. I feel that connection and move my personality out of the way. I allow the love to flow through me and I use my will to amplify it. I am literally turning my heart light on. It is staying on for longer periods of time. I believe that it will stay on non-stop with my focus. I am love. It is what I am made for. I am good at this. It is my joy. It is my delight. To be love, no matter what anyone else is doing or being. I chose to be love today.


Interesting day. Conclusion: no groups for now, sunshine means nature time, quiet loving time with my kids is enriching. Small world=enough for now. Time in my heart is the new playground.

2 thoughts on “Turning My Heartlight On

  1. Yes, just Being. No doing is required; there is nothing to do. Nowhere we must go. There is no thing that is good and no thing that is bad. It just is. That is the still point. The zero point. The common ground. We do not have to send love or send light or send peace. Sending is doing. This is another trap of the ego; a backdoor trap. Once we realize/awaken to who we already are, our very Presence 'does' all the work. "Your Very Presence is Your Fee". It's that simple, yet so complicated for those who are still letting go of the doing.

  2. Thank you for your clarity! I am knowing it in every cell of my body. I am "online" with love. My heart is a new instrument. I am new. I am love.
    It is true that the sending is a trap of the ego. God is.
    I Am.
    It is so simple….my heart is smiling:)

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