Monthly Archives: January 2012

Attuning to Nature’s Rhythm

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Last night, sleep eluded me for a time as my mind wound down from the energies of the day. I began to think of the rhythm of nature and how she is always teaching me through her example how to be in life. It is winter here in Northern California. I am following that energy by drawing more inward, craving fires and warm food. My inner earth dweller wants root vegies baked in the oven, warm cookies and hot drinks. No wonder I felt out of synch in Hawaii! My body knew it was to be wintertime, though it was an inward journey that I took there with my friend. I did not do the vacation activities associated with the islands.

It amazes me how we can live with nature all around yet not see the clues she leaves for us, until suddenly we do! While in Hawaii, camping on the shore, we moved our tent after the first night, seeking to be as close to the cliff edge as we could. We had laughed as we picked up our tent, carrying it in its open state, to the next site. “We are moving to our new home!” It was so easy and fun. I have been thinking how nature is always in the process of change. Whereas we have forgotten what that means. We find a home and settle in. We begin to accumulate things, beliefs, relationships and find ourselves locked in density. We are no longer free to move like the wind or shed our skin like the snake as we have become hardened in place with our jobs, our roles, our beliefs. We join a religious organization and stay locked into those beliefs, We stay in family dynamics long after we have outgrown them. After all, our family of origin is often the training wheels that we arranged for until we could navigate on our own, At such time, we are to drop them and ride free but for the most part, we do not. We hold to everything with almost a religious fervor rather than taking our cue from nature and allowing ourselves the freedom to flow. We stay stuck in traditions that we have outgrown, think of how the holidays are weighted with expectations of how we are to act rather than allowing who we now are, to set the desired scene.

We can allow the waters of life to rush past us, bending and shaping us into new forms.

It is our nature to flow and evolve. Mankind has become stuck in this density, believing it to be solid and real. We can allow people to flow in and out of our lives without attachment. Some relationships are meant to be short, some are long term. All are there for our growth. One is not better than another, they simply are. We do not have to stay because society tells us that you must love your mother when your mother is no longer someone with whom you resonate. There does not have to be judgment or blame, she is wrong, I am right. There is only the resonance of energies, does this fit who I am today? We are asked to honor ourselves by aligning with what fits in the moment. The butterfly does not seek to return to the cocoon, it knows that its path lays in flying free in the air, not lying entombed in the confines of the cocoon. Yet that is what we are programmed to do, stay in the confines so that we do not  fly free and discover our own beauty and power. 

We can allow possessions to change hands. What I need as a single woman is very different from what was needed as a mother and wife. Yet how many of us, let go of all that clutter and stuff and lighten our households, or change our residence to a smaller one. We can give ourselves the freedom to feel what is right for us in this moment of time. Perhaps the house that grew children remains the perfect place for grandchildren or a place to invite others in to live as I am witnessing happening. New configurations being formed from economic necessity.As a society, things are breaking down to help us evolve.  All this is movement, is allowing change and growth though it may manifest as suffering in the old model. Again, it is perspective. Many are having to reinvent themselves and find a freedom in letting go of jobs that no longer fit, even if the letting go is scary and not consciously chosen. Often, we create change in our lives,  that from our conscious smaller self, we would not have chosen. I played victim to circumstances in my life that I now view as life saving rather than life ending. How grateful I am to now be a conscious co-creator of my reality with my higher self. I trust always that she is showing me the shortcut home, whether my rational mind can understand it or not.

As we allow possessions to flow in and out, we discover that there is so much stuff in the world! I have begun noticing how things show up when I express a need or desire. As my son returned my car keys to me, a couple fell off the flimsy keyring. I thought, I need to look for a sturdy one so that I do not lose a key. Later that day, one that had been mine years ago showed up and it suited me perfectly! Small thing but the more I acknowledge and appreciate how the universe is caring for me, the more caring I receive!

Beliefs are another area that we get caught in. We were trained to see the world as black and white, shades of gray were not available. We can allow ourselves to contradict ourselves, try on new ideas, drop beliefs that no longer fit. Others may try to put you back in the former belief box as your changing can feel threatening to their way of seeing the world. There is a sense that the black and white box is a place of safety. Yet in truth, it is a form of enslavement as we allow ourselves to be manipulated by the powers that were. (Yes, were, as the old order is crashing down.)

A friend wrote the following to me and it spoke so deeply to my heart. She is an artist and I think a poet as well. She has given me permission to share this: 

sometimes i am overwhelmed with my good fortune – to be alive, to be able to think and act and make choices, to see the sky brighten as dawn arrives,  to love the earth, pachamama, to know she is perfection and i am a part of her.  i am so blessed to have had this wisdom come to me.  and when my dying time comes, i know I will know how to do this – even with the fear.
But it really is time for me to bring my energies inward, to have at least some years before my next great passing to study nurture and love, recognize, appreciate and enjoy all my uniquenesses – and then to release this too – i am not done with myself yet – i want to know so much more about how i am and how i work and to sit in the dappling sun, to watch another season pass over the gardens, feel the winds lifting away the debris of my carcass, to watch those coils from and to mother loosen and fall flaccid to the ground.  ahhhhh – yes i am still breathing!

With that, I leave you and enter this misty morning.

Watching from an Expanded View

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As I flew across the sea, I felt the energies of many meeting me. I felt some draw back in apprehension that I was to come again. I saw clearly how I challenge folks to be in their truth as I stand more firmly in mine. I felt the invitation from others and indeed had received a note asking me to come anchor my light in the area. I was surprised to see someone very dear to recoil from my energy and then saw the why of it. His partner has been running an unconscious energy that has been using his light. He has been stuck, not able to move forward,  disempowered. This pattern is familiar to me as I played out this giving away of my power for years with my former husband. And even more recently, a quick tour of it once again during those few days in Kauai that I wrote of as a final unwinding of that coil for me.

It is through the heart that loves so deeply that the hook gets set. The souls who show up to play this role for us do so out of their love, as it is not an easy role.   First order of business was to meet with this person and others close to him to bring the pattern to conscious awareness. We had all been feeling it for some time but now it felt time to speak to what we saw taking place on an energetic level. I found myself getting emotional and knew I had to have no attachment as to the outcome. The message was given by all and received in grace. The person left to find his way through it.

Next day, I spent supporting and participating in a women’s healing group. It was powerful as we practiced consciously pulling our own energy back to ourselves and clearing our fields before and after each session.  As we used sound healing and sacred geometry to facilitate our session, it felt like a play date. We had crystals, drums, rattles, decks of cards as well as crystal and Tibetan bowls to play with. I had asked to be in a triangle formation

These pictures are reminding me to take the expanded view on life!

as had another. She lay on the massage table and I elected to lay under it on the floor. I found myself in a sarcophagus going through an initiation of death and resurrection. I knew that death was an illusion and found that I could lie there in peace. Interesting. I had been reading about this initiation that Jesus and his community of Essences underwent as part of their Egyptian training.

Sunday I drove 3 hours each way to attend an opera performance in which my niece was starring. It was the first time that I saw her perform professionally and wanted to support her. I knew it meant contact with those who rejected me after the divorce. Truly I have released most biological relations except those with my children, so this was not a situation where there was a deep bond of understanding. I realize that most of them do not know what to make of me. Yet my higher self guided me to show up and so I did. It was delightful to see my niece give her gift to the world. What great joy it is to be doing what you love and sharing it! I also had the unexpected delight of seeing my nephews with their fiances and seeing the twining of their hearts’ love. The new babies are excited at these unions that they can come in through. It was also interesting to see folks’ energy in a way I have never seen before. I can read the energy and see how the outer behavior differs or aligns. Interesting.

The time in my car is always good for me for meditation. As I was driving, I felt a shudder of grief move through me. It was followed by a wave of loneliness. I breathed and traced it to its source. I felt that the person that I have spoken of above, had decided to leave the earth plane. Grief like a laser through me. It shook me to my core. I asked for more

all perspective as to which view we see

information, could not touch his energy field. I saw that the loneliness was the sense that I would be left to carry out our part of the plan for the new earth, on my own. I sensed that I was to be at peace with this and feel it all from that place of neutrality. We have been taught that death is the end rather than another doorway taken. We view it as bad when it is something that is part of the cycle of this life. I am feeling more and more the truth of neutrality as what appears wonderful can be devastating and what appears to have been the darkest experience, often turns out to be the greatest blessing. So, I felt the lesson of the sarcophagus with me as I reached for peace and calm. Later, I did speak with this dear heart by phone and so had a physical reassurance that he was ok but knew that I was being given a lesson. In the oneness, we are all connected. It does not start and stop, it is always there. It prompted me to do a round of releasing of all ties and cording from my space. To claim my sovereignty and pull back any ties that I had in others’ fields. I saw the image of me floating on a cloud and I was reaching out to detach all these fish hooks tied to lines that were connected to folks on the earth as well as old belief systems. I heard that it is time, time to let go and surrender all. We are walking into  a new landscape and truly we can take nothing and carry no one. What we can do is shine our light, to be a beacon and guide for others. It is time to let those seeking,  come to us. We must ask in this world of freewill for it to be given.

A bittersweet time as my deepest connections are falling away as I journey to the connection with my I AM Presence. It is the cycle of nature for us to outgrow our skins, to hatch from the cocoon. We travel together for a time until some inner prompting carries us to a new landscape. I can no longer be the anchor for others in the same way. My cheerleading, pushing, pulling, prodding days are over. The days of being the “wall” that others throw their issues at, knowing that the love is there, are finished. The wall is crumbling down and with it, I let go of the fatigue of all those years of not being seen for the love that I AM, by others as well as myself.  I am called inward to the solitude as are so many lightworkers at this time. We are facing our fears, strengthening our resolve and settling into the peace that will be needed in the times ahead. Every cell affirms that I have the training for this time and I am ready. I know that as I release those dearest to me,that they have the training and mastery to walk their paths also. Truly there is rejoicing in that knowing!

Winging My Way Back to the Mainland

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On a plane, flying away from the Hawaiian islands. It all feels surreal to me. I drop into my heart and feel the codes from ancient Lemuria that I have picked up as well as the beauty of the garden of eden that we are returning to. I am so grateful to be a vehicle for these codes, a seed carrier. I see how I am asked to anchor them in to the mainland at the West Coast. I have a knowing of this and feel the spiral as I play my part. All of this is outside the rational mind, it takes place on the screen of my heart that has come alive in newness. I feel the cast of characters, the change of scene that is happening at the moment as my body flies from one backdrop to another.

Sacramento, a place where I experienced some of my darkest days. Yet, I come again. I had just received a request from an old friend to come and anchor light in this area. Ha, here I come. I see that we visit and revisit places, situations, and emotions in our lives until we have fully unwound the coil. We may think with our minds, that we are done with something but our hearts have the final say. We have to come to peace, come to a place of neutrality, a place where there remain no triggers in our relationships. We know when we have reached this, as the coil gently lets go its last wind, and slips into the mist, freed from the torque that held it in place, Each unwinding gifts us with a new found freedom. As I let go of more and more of these coils that I have kept in place with my emotions, I feel as though I am flying, The freedom is so intoxicating!

The choice is there in every moment to surrender to the reality of love that is present in every, yes, every situation. Close your eyes and drop into your heart. I have created a beautiful heart space, you can decorate yours to your heart’s content! I go and join my mighty I AM presence, beautiful Sophia, there. She is always so happy to see me and we feel such joy to be together.

I sit on my golden cushion, which is illuminated by a sunbeam so bright, and smiling, let

I feel that I have come full circle in many ways, coming to completion with cycles of my life, free to step off into the new!

myself go. I can ask to be the eagle and see a situation from a higher perspective. All the hard edges disappear and a softness surrounds whatever is my issue. I see that I have a choice to let go…..so much takes care of itself when we withdraw our anxious energy from it and bathe it in the flame of love. We can bathe our whole being in this flame and feel the truth of knowing that we are loved beyond measure.

I feel great peace as I take this next step. Excited at the opening of a space to be and sit in my own juices for a time. Allowing the ripening to take place. I feel creativity flowing in my palms as my hands vision handiwork that delights. I am called to co-create this new earth through my visioning, focusing much of my attention on sending our my ribbons of liquid lovelight and seeing the new relationships, economies. communities, and cities of light, coming into being.  Seeing all my brothers and sisters free, free to live as they chose, free from the survival activities and moving into their joy. Seeing the hearts opening all across the earth as the bubbles of love descend from the cosmos and arise from our Mother. The tears flow freely as my heart is asked to expand once again. I am called to hold the immaculate concept for this beauty and know that I am well trained. We are masters who have been in training for eons. I see us shedding our invisibility cloaks and shining our true essence of love out into the world. Our light will attract others who vibrate as we do. We are finding our family, one by one. Together, arm in arm, we are walking towards our new home. All can enter in, you do not have to wait for  an invitation. All of the kingdoms are awaiting our arrival. We simply have to make the choice to step into the new, to let go of our old ways of doing and embrace the beauty and love that we are. My gratitude knows no end!

 

Flames of Love in the Sky

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Tonight was my last night on the island. Tomorrow I head back to California carrying my Lemurian codes and the Mary energies. The sunset at the beach blessed us with flames of pink light filling the sky. I have never experienced the love that the sun was emitting tonight. It went through me like a shudder as my heart expanded wider and the tears came. We had had a challenging afternoon with more being uncovered in our beings of times of being silenced, censored, quieted, as well as the usual torture, burning at the stake and myriad methods used to silence the divine feminine voice. The Marys are asking for the gag to be taken off and for we women to open our mouths and speak our truth. After we were able to remain present as various emotions surfaced to be loved, we decided to go to the beach to swim and cleanse ourselves in the beautiful mother ocean. The waves were strong and it took some effort to get out past their breaking fury. Once beyond, I could lay on my back and float with my ankles crossed, looking at the horizon as I bobbed along. Ahhhhh….exactly what my body needed. Coming back to my towel, I was delighted to find that a sunset wedding was being prepared for. It was such fun to watch as I LOVE

weddings. I get so giddy and feel like the little girl who owned a bride doll that was my pride and joy. At five years of age, I spent a night in the hospital getting my tonsils out (terrifying experience) and somehow my bride doll, with her little pearl earrings and white dress, was lost never to be seen again. I grieved for that doll! So, I was in heaven watching this couple exchange their vows. The Hawaiian minister blew a few deep blasts on his conch shell and the ceremony began. Love was filling the beach and my heart expanded into it. A musician played his ukulele as the couple repeated their vows of love. What a bold step marriage is. I am curious to see how we engage in our partnering in the new earth. Somehow I believe it will be more fluid, as we are with another as long as it brings joy and continued growth to both parties. Separating will be more fluid as we will acknowledge the love and know when it is time to move on. I know that there will be more love in all ways with everyone and everything.

The sky went from this golden yellow to the softest of pinks. I felt the color of love flow through me. It was an essence, so strong and pure. This is the liquid lovelight I see in my dreams. Golden raindrops of love raining down upon the earth. We are being saturated with love particles. I am truly in awe of what is happening! I have waited so long for this day and here we are!

My friend and I found ourselves laughing as I commented that the groom looked old, about 60 or so. Wait a minute….we are fast approaching that age and we are not old! We laughed at how we still use numbers and have a conception of what an age looks like but surely do not feel that applies to ourselves! After all, we are getting younger. I truly believe that this is happening. If you want to do a great meditation for infusing your cells with the

remembrance of immortality and health, check out the Children of the Sun’s latest transmission for Monday’s new moon. I could hardly move afterward as it takes you to such a deep place. A friend of mine began this service and she does mighty work through the site. They do a transmission every new and full moon to energize and infuse the planetary crystalline grid. It is a wonderful way to participate in a group meditation with thousands (she has something like 40,000 folks on board!) What an opportunity to send peace and love around the earth!! Here is the link:  https://www.childrenofthesun.org/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=448%3Agrid-transmissions-january-9&catid=39&Itemid=169

We finished our evening at a pizza place and I was amazed at the way I felt. I felt so much love and tenderness for everyone there! The older couples with their Hawaiian shirts and khaki shorts, the children with their energy and joy, the waitresses with their patience and kindness. I complimented the girl taking the order on her calm and warm manner with the line stretching far behind us. She responded that it was easy as the customers were all so nice. This is what it will be like all the time! We will be living in the lovelight and everything will radiate and receive love. Oh, I am so grateful to be here, to be feeling all of this. My friend and I talked for hours over our pizza reviewing the dark energies that we have experienced trying to put out the divine feminine light. We gave thanks for it all, all that has brought us to this present moment. Gratitude flowed for all those who loved us enough to hold that harsher energy. We made our way home, lit our sage bundle and saged one another to lift the memories and allow the smoke and violet flame to return them all back to the love. I love sage, what a gift from our Mother Earth. I love the smell and I could feel the power of the release as she helped us to let go by clearing our auras and spirits. We are so blessed! Sage, sun emitting love rays, kind waitresses, pink clouds……Love is in the air……de dah da de dah……remember that song? I am singing it tonight. Sweet dreams.

 


Coils Unwinding and Grace Appearing

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The green of this grass, the blue of the water, the steepness of the cliffs, the wind that was blowing.....all conspired to allow my soul to take flight

I have been feeling and observing the deep uncoiling of old patterns and beliefs from within my body and my psyche. We are being gently moved into the new land of unity consciousness. I am seeing that we cannot carry any of the old with us. All must go. All must be given away, let go of. When we depart in death, we know that we can take nothing with us. All the material accumulations of a lifetime, the recognitions or honors earned, the stories told and lived, all must be given into the flame of the Creator’s heart. There it undergoes the alchemical process of turning the dross into gold. We are ascending in our bodies, we are truly dying to the old and birthing the new. We do not have to die in the old way to return to the Godhead to renew our knowing of who we are. We can experience the death and rebirth here and now, in this physical plane.

So let the coils of “who do you think you are!” and “you are not good enough” and “others have it together and you are a mess”, depart once and for all. See them for the illusion that they are. These voices become more pronounced as we get closer to the threshold of our own Christhood. The pitch becomes feverish as we stand poised at the door, wondering what are our gifts? What can we bring to the table? What do we have to offer? All is smoke and mirrors to keep us from taking that one step that transports us into our new life.

 

 

 

portals and thresholds have been part of my journey these past couple of years, serving as reminders that the time was approaching for me to move through to the other side.

 

 

I have asked for ease and grace and direction now that I have felt aninternal switch being flipped, letting me know that my work here on Maui is done. I observed the anxiety arise, now what? Now where? I felt its unease deeply, you have no home, no work, no purpose. I breathed and came back to the love in my heart, asking God to show me the next step. I was called deeper into my heart to find the answers. And grace entered in and took my hand. A friend called and suddenly said, “I know somewhere you might stay as my friend is going overseas for two months.” This friend knew that I did not feel comfortable in the energies in Sacramento and did not stay long yet she felt guided to mention this possibility to me. I listened but rejected it as I was thinking coastline. A day or two later I awoke with the knowing that I was to call this woman and consider the possibility. As we connected, it became clear that this was the way of ease and grace opening to me. I would not have to search for a place nor deal with leases and rental agreements….all things that feel too foreign for this space that I am in. The surroundings would be familiar so getting food, walking along the river in the park lands, would all be known. No extra energy required to figure out. I had been shown that what I have woven here with a friend is to now be woven with my youngest son and he is living in the area at present. All is set up for me! Grace and yet my mind might have sabotaged me from stepping into it. Oh, we are such dear funny creatures, asking for grace and support and then thinking we know best the hows and whens and whos of it arriving! I accepted the gift with an open heart and feel such deep peace. My desire is to be in my own space (something that I have not had except the nights in my tent alone) and drop deeply into the stillness of my own heart. I have seen that is the service that I am to do at this time. For in the dropping in and with my presence with myself, I can birth my Christhood.We are truly at the threshold and each of us who steps across, sends waves throughout the planet that enliven and quicken other hearts to join ours in reclaiming our mastery and walking the planet as the masters that we are. As Jesus foretold, “All that I do, you shall do also and even greater than this.” I feel the truth of this in my cells.

 

A German man staying here at the house, gave me this bit of palm tree for my birthday.

What no one ever told me, was that stepping into our light and power and mastery would take everything we have. We have endured so many trials and tribulations and now we are asked to accept beauty and grace and light. As the light enters in, the fears fly up and we wonder if we dare to claim this light. Can I truly be this magnificence? Our beings quake at what is offered, at the immensity of the light that we are being asked to hold. At times, I can only lie and tremble as the waves move through me and I gasp at what is being shown.

I was so touched by this gift from a man staying here at my friend’s place through Air B&B. What a wonderful service, where you rent out your extra room to travelers. It is an example of the win-win industries and exchanges that are springing up all over as we remember our oneness. I love this new earth! So my bit of palm frond with his drawing and beautiful quote. Truly my heart has grown wings( I have certainly watered them well with my tears) and I am ready to soar!

Only a heart with wings can fly!

Floating in the Mary Energies

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This mural was in a bathroom in a local restaurant. So colorful and bright, I wanted to float with all the sea creatures.

Days fly by and I miss my writing. This is one of those immersion times where I am so “in” the journey that I barely crawl into bed (skipped brushing my teeth, that tired) and have no capacity to reflect on my life. It takes all of me to live it. Today is the first new moon of 2012 and sees us entering Aquarius. Freedom! My sign as yesterday was my 56th birthday and for this Aquarian gal, I am finally at home on this beautiful earth. The energies of freedom are anchoring in more fully which allows me deeper breaths. Ahhhh…..

Where to begin telling you about the past few days? My friend and I knew that we were to take a journey together and that it had to do with the Mary energies. She carries the Mary Magdalene energies of the sexual priestess, and I carry more of the Mother Mary energies of the nurturing mother. A side note: Mary Magdalene was not a whore as the patriarchal fathers wanted us to believe. She did train in the temples of Isis to learn the art of sacred sexuality which she used to help Jesus fufill his mission. Sacred sexuality is a gift from the Creator that can be used consciously to aid in attaining enlightenment. (read Tom Kenyon’s The Magdelene Manuscript). She attained Christ hood with Jesus as they were twin flames working together for mankind. Back to my story….together, the Marys have asked my friend and I to weave a tapestry. (I am so ready to get cloth and threads and create some of what I have been experiencing in a physical way). We decided to go to

 

 

the view a few feet in front of our tent

a national park to camp for a few days. We packed our book that we felt directed to read, Anna Grandmother of Jesus by Claire Heartsong as well as some fruits and vegies. There was no running water which thins out the crowd and we elected to camp further from the parking lot camping area to have more privacy and more nature. I loved the way it was set up. There were these beautiful trees set in a mowed area of grass with a picnic table at hand. You followed the mowed pathways through the grasses from tree to tree and chose your spot. We spent one night totally sheltered under the canopy of a huge tree. The tree was so loving, embracing us in its shade. We could hear the crashing waves

 

 

Our tent set up under the beautiful tree with the mowed grass and picnic table.

on rocks below as we watched the stars come to life out our front door. The next night we moved our tent to a new site, shown here where we were further out on the point. We could take a few steps and watch the waves crashing below and lie naked for a morning sunbath in the dewy grass. Bliss! I watched the sunrise each morning and we watched whales come up to greet us as we sang and drummed for them. I am so thankful to them for all the record keeping that they have done forever to assist us to this point in time where we can once again anchor the energies of unity consciousness on the planet for ourselves.

our welcome sunrise!

We truly communed with the elements as on our last night the rain and wind storm flattened the tent almost on top of us! It was a wild night as we sat up, trying to hold the tent sides in place as the rain found its way inside. Wet and wild and pretty sleepless. We were glad to see the stars begin to finally reappear as the rain ceased and the wind spent its fury. Dawn was a welcome sight! Our days were spent swimming in the sacred pools that spill down with the waterfalls to the ocean below. It felt otherworldly as we swam under the spray and floated in the lovely rock lined pools. We took turns reading aloud to one another as we journeyed deep into the Mary stories. Anna, who was the mother of both Mother Mary and Joseph of Arimathea

The bridge over the first pool and the waterfalls leading down to the pools and ocean below.

(who fathered Mary Magdalene) was the narrator of the tale. I had not heard her story before and found it fascinating. It has been an incredible time for us as we drifted between dimensions. We were being activated as we read, deep cellular memories were triggered and we felt many of the scenes in our bodies. It has been surreal, looking out at the ocean, dropping into the scene in the Essene communities, feeling their initiations, coming up to breathe and eat an avocado, feeling overcome with waves of sleep as we traveled on the inner planes. I have been overcome with emotion, tears quietly running down my cheeks as we journeyed with the players who came with Jesus to assist him in his mission. We were assisted by the elements of nature, allowing us to simply be held in her arms as we could feel that the time is at hand where we are being called to birth the Christ within our hearts. We were players in that time 2000

The view from the top of the bridge, looking down on the pools.

years ago and we have returned to play the scene in a new way. Jesus and his companions anchored the Christ light in the earth and the crystalline grid that surrounds the planet. It was done for this time, when the earth’s energies were light enough to begin her ascension process as well as our own. We are ascending back to the Creator as our Father/Mother God wants us home.

I am feeling so blessed tonight as I know that I am being guided to the awakening of the Christ flame in my heart. I feel so at one with the beauty of mother nature as she shows me oneness as flocks of brilliant white birds fly by in their seamless formations. They do their dance of changing leaders, each one knowing how to align in fluid beauty, like bright ribbons across the sky. I want to see all people on this planet free, free to know their own beauty, free to move in harmony with their fellows, free to dance with the wind and sky.

I leave you with this graffiti message I found in the cement block bathroom at the park. I thought that it was beautiful! If you desire to birth the Christ flame in your heart, loving yourself is key. All that you have been taught about being harsh with yourself in any way, any shame or blame or judgement, can melt in the flame of your own loving heart. Bring in the wood and fan those flames high, toss in all the words that play the old critical tapes in your head that you inherited from family, society, and culture. Love and honor your own beauty and the Christ light will blaze its love for all to see. I so love you!

 

 

 

Feeling the Lovelight

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After 2am and I am awake. The internet can be an amazing friend in the middle of the night. I can go on facebook and connect with friends who live in other parts of the earth, who are awake in these wee hours when I “should” be asleep. The shoulds have left and we are in this new landscape where we are feeling our way to what is “normal”. Even that concept is a limit as we move out of any sense that there is a routine or way of living. We are moving to simply “living”. Sleeping when our bodies tell us, moving when they desire, eating what resonates in the moment with no definition of being a vegetarian or vagan or meat eater. We let go of the need to define who we are. The old society’s way of identifying ourselves is dissolving. We are not our jobs, we are not our familial roles (wife, mother, brother), we are not our age, we are not our income, we are not where we live (American, European, African). We are moving into unity consciousness where the lines of demarcation melt away. We are beginning to know one another by our energy signature. Isn’t that beautiful? I have had an innate sense of this, that I respond to the energy of a person, not the illusion of the exterior appearance. I feel so grateful to have lived to this time where it is becoming the truth in the outer world as well.

The days pass with a speed that amazes yet with a fullness that fills my heart. I can get lost in the wind as it swirls through the leaves of the palms, in the beauty of a spider on the porch. In fact, two spiders on the porch thrilled me this morning. I was amazed at this smiling sun that she carried on her back. I felt that I wanted to carry the same smile on my face. Isn’t she magnificent?  I am so grateful to my higher self, Sophia, for arranging my life so that I have time to sit and commune with the beauty of this pair of spiders this morning. So, sunshine girl felt feminine to me next to her warrior counterpart.

 

Isn’t he something! It looks like he is wearing a mask designed to frighten enemies. So cool! I love nature, each day she has something beautiful to gift me with. I am learning to speak her language, to see the myriad ways that she communicates with me. As I drop deeper in to her world, I drop deeper into my inner world. We are going camping in a couple of days. My friend is taking me to a rustic site on the ocean where there are sacred sites. We plan on being in the silence and are open to the gifts it has for us. I can feel the energy of preparation working through me.

Today we went to a shamanic homeopathic healer. She did her magic and instead of receiving only a bottle or tube of a remedy,  she made us pouches to wear around our necks with a tiny stone imbued with the remedy. She wanted our bodies to get used to the remedy in this way for a few days before taking the drops. I thought it was fitting for our journey. Of course, I chose a bright pink satin bag to honor the divine feminine seeking fuller expression so it looks a bit different than a traditional native medicine bag. Yet, it serves that purpose as I will add a couple of my own talismans to it to see me through this journey that the past couple of weeks has been a preparation for. I get a sense of something coming and know that the Marys, Mother Mary and Mary Magdalene, have gifts for me. I am preparing myself to receive them with grace.  My body is now calling me to sleep and the land of dreams. Goodnight and sweet dreams.

Touched Down Here on the Islands

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What a difference a day or two can make! I am in Maui, staying with a beautiful soul sister that I met last fall at a Tom Kenyon workshop. We are so close, it almost feels like we are one another. We have had such similar journeys and are holding energy for the planet in a similar way. Yesterday her knee was hurting and she came home to find my knee was acting strange. We can be in silence as we tune ourselves to one another. Beautiful as words become harder to access ( I find myself gesturing with my hands to describe something or calling everything “thing”) our telepathic abilities are coming online. Our memories are being erased (no, you are not getting Alzeimer’s!) which is a blessing as it lands us squarely in the present moment. It allows old patterns of belief and behavior to melt away like the mist that I feel around me all the time. Have you experienced not knowing what you are doing, where you are? We are transversing time lines and dimensions as we align with our new light bodies and avatar selves. It can be jarring to suddenly “wake up” in a space and reorient ourselves to the moment we are in. What am I doing? Why am I doing this? It makes me laugh these days but if you do not know what is happening you may think that you are losing your mind. And yes, we are. We are losing our ability to live by our minds. We are being rewired to live from our hearts. What a blessing as that is where all the love resides and when you think with your heart, you are in alignment with your soul.It is amazing how interconnected we all are. I was reading a blog from a woman who I know to be another soul sister, http://livingshambhala.wordpress.com/ and her other blog:
http://lisagawlas.wordpress.com.
Our sites have matching gold colors and we are both playing in the fields of Shambhala. It is delightful that it is accelerating, this finding of soul family. The love energies of Venus are streaming in today to bless us. Can you feel the way our hearts are truly opening to these streams of pink, magenta love? We are becoming magnetized to one another, to our places and experiences that are aligned with our divine plan and the divine plan for the earth. There is a tremendous amount of clearing taking place as our old wounds and fears come up to be embraced and loved. Love everything and allow it to flow through you. Accept everything as the teacher it is and see the lesson that your soul is bringing to you. Let it flow in, let it flow out like the waves that crash so powerfully on the shore. Last night we drove down this rutted dirt road to the ocean. As we walked out to the point, my friend said, “ I bet we will see a whale.” A few minutes later we saw a baby whale flipping his tail up to say hello. We were singing and laughing in delight with him and he graced us with six flips before diving deep with mama. It felt like such a communion. We were then blessed with the most amazing sunset. It started off with a soft yellow and continued through gold and finally into a Pele (the Hawaiian goddess of the volcano and fire) pleasing flaming red! Wowzer! I felt her flame burning inside of me!  

 

I picked up an old copy of the Mutant Message Down Under, by Margo Morgan. I had read it years ago but this time I understood it in a much deeper way. The tribe of aborigines that take her on a few months walk through the outback, have never lost their connection to the earth and one another. Their philosophy and way of life has such beauty and grace and we are moving towards that heart based way of being once again. No, we do not have to take off our clothes and subsist on grubs from the desert, but we do have to take off the protective coverings we have placed on our hearts and return to the knowingness that we are all one, with one another and with all the kingdoms of the earth. The flowers want to help as my flower essence friend demonstrated so clearly, the crystals want to help as demonstrated by my new soul sister of the Shambhala blog site who I asked for a reading. (I am no longer looking for outside confirmation for my path, rather felt a strong desire to connect with her to see what we would create together). She said the crystal that she will send to me, has already aligned with me and helped to merge me with my avatar self. Wow! Truly everything is here to serve. And the clearer we get on our path, the more we know that service is what we are here for. It took me awhile to understand this. First, as the “duty” woman that I was, I had to let go of any idea of service. It was an ego based notion, that to feel good about myself, I had to be helping others. When I let that go, I realized that it all begins by serving ourselves. It is not the selfishness that we are taught to not engage in, it is selfhood. Self care, self nurturing, self honoring. It is no longer abandoning myself in order to “be nice”. What is nice anyway? There is only being true to me. True to what resonates, true to what enlivens my heart. This did not come about it a moment. I began from a place of not knowing what made me happy, what brought me joy, what my truth was. I could tell you what it was for my family, but not for myself. It has been a journey. I had to first identify and then clear all the old limiting patterns and beliefs that served their function by helping me survive this harsh 3D environment. As I have become more peaceful inside, I serve our mother by making my footprint one of lightness rather than a burden on her. In loving ourselves truly for the beauty and wonder that we are, we allow her to reclaim her beauty and return to the garden of eden. That is one of the reasons that I was called to Hawaii, to pick up the Edenic codes for the community of light that I am to co-create. All is being restored through our pure hearts. Find something today to celebrate about you! I love your beauty!

Reclaiming More of Myself

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This has been an interesting few days for me as I rode the waves of energy streaming in. Huge lessons unfolded showing me once again where I was giving away my power and allowing my light to be used. I am understanding that my higher self will do all she can to uncoil every pattern and belief that no longer serves me. Thought that I had uncoiled this pattern yet there was more to unwind. It began with me agreeing to share a one bedroom space and sleep on a pull out couch (the bathroom was only accessed through the bedroom, I did not know this when I agreed to the arrangement). Also to not get my own rental car so to not have any independence. I had not experienced that in eons. I see how I neglected to make sure I had my basic needs cared for.  In this, I created the perfect container for this lesson to unfold. Seems so strange as this is not how I operate but the universe conspires to create what is needed for our soul’s growth. We do things out of the ordinary to learn. The clues were amazing: I had picked up a Nicholas Sparks novel from the cupboard, thinking light read for the beach. He wrote Message in a Bottle and the Notebook…..light love stories. Or so I thought but this one described a woman in a abusive controlling relationship……clue #1. Next, I read my horoscope for the week and he described two sea plants that made a beautiful color combination but one was a parasite to the other. He said to be aware of that relationship……clue #2. This person began to question the consciousness of  who I spoke to and what I wrote in my blog….paranoia about our work needing to be secret……clues #3 & 4.(this is embarrassing to write as I listened to him! Yikes)  My body began to feel ill, headache and nausea and fatigue that made looking for a new situation difficult to do……clue #5. Yes, this all got my attention. I had felt a heaviness and sense of confinement. Finally, I took the step to leave the situation. (this all took place over 3 days time but felt like an age!) I wrote a couple of days ago that this person was a catalyst for my growth, and he was, just not in the way that I  expected. I realized that I could honor no one’s connection to Source over my own. I was pulled in by the feeling that we shared a mission (not a romance, he is gay) and so much was true but there was this aspect that did not line up. The lesson for me is that it can be off by a lot or a little, but it is still off. Big lesson, big gratitude to my body, my higher self and my angels and guides for helping me to see the truth of what was happening. I love the way Spirit is always giving us signs to show us the way!

So moved to a new space, ahhh the joy of breathing freely in my own energy once again! Came here yesterday and have been resting since. My body has been recovering from the energy drain. I realized that everything is wanting to be loved, including all the dark energy that is rising to be released and returned to the light. As all this beautiful lovelight streams in, all that does not resonate, must depart. It can be sticky and messy but I watched as it flowed out of my field like a black mist. I blessed it with love and let it go. Whew! Mother Gaia sent me thanks as it released the energy from her also. Truly what we do is felt on many different levels. I acknowledged that I am a big heartlight on this planet and I attract the shadows that desire to return to the reality of love. I am so grateful to Archangel MIchael for his continual protection and care.

I am blessed with friends who I can call who respond immediately.  They helped me to clear my field and nurtured me. One new friend is a gifted flower essence creator. I love flowers and have always felt that they were my true language. But she takes it to a whole new level. She began to describe an essence that might help me, and I instantly felt it in my body. My bones had been aching since this encounter, deep ache…..it lifted. She then

spoke of another one that might help and I began to cry as it was so deeply nurturing. She said, “The flowers love you and are filled with joy when they can be of help.” I could feel their love and allowed my cells to drink it up. What an amazing gift she has. I love seeing the different gifts we each bring to the table. How wonderful is this world!

So tonight I am feeling gratitude for all that has taken place.  I have experienced much of the shadow energies in this lifetime, expanding my heart’s capacity to love. It has not been an easy path. I am grateful for all who have played the darker roles on this stage, allowing us to experience duality and separation. I know we have all played lifetimes as the dark and the light. I am ready to be in the new play of unity consciousness! I am ready to play in the fairy realm, of which I am a part. To be light and joy and dancing flames of love. I know love has tipped the scales and is flooding our planet and our hearts. I will continue to offer myself as a chalice of living lovelight to anchor into our Mother’s heart. Shadows are dispersing. We are all going home as there is only the love and the light.

Floating in the Mists of No Time

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Here is the moon setting that I awoke to this morning. Fun to see the world a bit differently, the moon setting in the am rather than the sun rising!

Here I am in Kauai. I have been here for two days now and it remains unreal in many ways. Today I feel a bit more connected to the landscape. Leaving San Francisco had been a trial in density. The packing, moving and cleaning my son’s apartment that I had shared for the past two months, was a struggle. I felt that I was wading through quicksand. I had a melt down the final day, truly felt that I could not do anymore. Even as I gave vent to my frustration and the tears flowed, I knew that I was releasing for the collective. We are moving out of 3D density and polarity into 5D unity consciousness. As I walked through the last remnants of the density, I knew that the remaining coils were being unwound to set me free on my journey. I saw the spirals of energy, of each of my adult children, spinning freely in a forward motion. My work was done in that regard as well as my anchoring of light in San Francisco. Time to move as the energies spun to this island. It had felt dream like from the time I was guided to book a ticket. I saw mists and could see nothing when I was trying to plan on a return ticket. It felt as if I would be absorbed by the mists that had been haunting me for the past few months. I have a sense that this may be the 3 days of darkness so many have spoken of. I sense it will be soft and fluid as we walk into the mists…like the Avalon stories. Walking towards the grail cup of our own Christed divinity. The only requirement is to let go. Let go of everything in the sure knowledge that all will be given to us. The biggest obstacles to letting go are intimate relationships and money. These are the things that we create beliefs around that keep us in situations that no longer serve our highest good. It is time to let go of all that does not feed our hearts with joy. We must leap, trusting that the net will be there without the proof of our senses.  The time is now!

The days have a flow to them that makes each one feel like a week has passed. I am bringing in so much more of myself and integrating the vastness of my being into this form. Tonight I channeled El Morya for the first time. El Morya is all about God’s divine will. He anchored in the divine masculine ray that comes to balance the divine feminine that anchored in last year. I am owning that I am an aspect of El Morya and that I did come to this planet on a mission of love to offer assistance. The game had become too unfair and the climb too steep for the masses to find their way back to their divinity. Many of us came as intercessors. Tonight I owned this in a new way through a storm of tears. It is so much to take in when one has spent a lifetime feeling separate from the norm. I am beginning to see that my community is in a dimension that is presently anchoring in. It was not to be found in this reality. No wonder I could not find my place in the landscape, in a group of people nor in a partner. All are waiting for me as I walk this bridge into the new earth.

view outside

I had beautiful dreams during last night’s full moon. In one, I was in Australia, visiting a dear friend. He told me that another friend lived next door, I could walk right over and visit. Then that friend told me another dear friend lived next door to him. Joy…all my friends were gathered together and we could play with ease. I awoke knowing that is how it will be, all whom we love, will be there for us to play with. Nothing and no one is truly lost to us. In the next part of the night, I found myself anointing folks with rose oil on their foreheads and then kissing them all over their face. With each kiss I said, “Receive the love, receive the love.” I knew that I was liquid lovelight and it flowed effortlessly from my lips just as it flowed effortlessly into my heart from my Creator. I felt so blessed to be an instrument of this love. It was not romantic love, but pure love from the Creator’s heart. Earlier in the day, Mary Magdalene and Yeshua had come in to speak of the mission we are currently on. They filled our chalices from their hearts with this divine love. I offer myself as a living chalice of love and in doing so, I am filled anew. The whole process fills me with awe and gratitude. The more that I offer my chalice to others to drink from, the more is given to me to drink. God is all about the win-win paradigm. As we give, we are given.

Tonight I go to sleep sated with myself, with the knowing that I am at the very point in time that I came to this earth for. That the whole hologram is to shift and it is happening now. That I have a part to play and that I have the heart mastery to play it well. I sigh in deep gratitude and joy that I am in my perfect place in this land of no time. Mother Gaia is aligned and ready to make her move. I feel her excitement as my own. I am so grateful for all of you who have had the courage to play your parts alongside me. We are changing the hologram. We are co-creating the new earth.

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