In my recent clean out of bookshelves, I stumbled upon a slim volume of writing published in 1940. The redwood tree on the cover pulled me in. As I flipped through the pages, I felt the gentle wisdom within that I could now hear at a deeper level. On page 33 (3’s are my numbers and 33 is Christ mastery in my book) I read the following that is still echoing in my heart:
“Seek not of your own personal self to do deeds, to work, to plan, yea seek not even to be of high service to Me. I, the great Source of the Universe, do plan that it shall be a Universe of peace and harmony, and what I desire—shall it not come to pass? Therefore you need make no plans for the fufillment of that which I have ordained. There is but one service required of you, namely—-to reflect Me. Make the personal self to be so nothing, that it shall be I, speaking through your lips, smiling through your eyes. When man does thus live, my perfect plan shall be fufilled……..How free are you then, as you go singing through your day, always knowing that the One you reflect is guiding every step of the way.” from The Voice of the Master by Eva Bell Werber.
I was struck by the phrase I placed in bold type. To let go of any idea of service, of duty…..that has been a walk of surrender and trust for me. I was deeply imprinted from many lifetimes in the cloister, with following a path of duty. Taking off the hairshirt, unwinding the rosary beads….a process. I still pray to Mother Mary at times, I recite decrees when I feel called, I still live a devotional path in many ways but without the fear and supplication that was previously present within the acts. I allow the guidance to move me. There is freedom in the complete surrender of my mental process and the allowance of my own divinity to move me as She will. I look around at my rosary, my prayer beads, prayer books, my first holy communion statue of Mother Mary, as artifacts that have been a part of my journey. I honor their role and know that I am no longer defined by them.
I, and many at this time, are feeling this guidance in our moments. We are recognizing the inner voice of our own mastery as we tune into the knowing and allow it free rein. Following where we are led, sitting in the stillness when there is no prompting to move or act. The phrase: Be still and Know that I AM God, has been showing up in my world the past couple of days. I am gifted with a couple of days of solitude, knowing it was orchestrated for my benefit. I cleaned house yesterday and am feeling that expansive peace this morning, knowing chores are done and the day is waiting to unfurl. My mind jumps in with ideas: from finishing my prayer flag project, starting on the making of a gift, going to the farmer’s market, taking a walk in the park……..my body, wisdom keeper that she is…..is sitting. Breathing in the sunlight that is melting last night’s frost. She allows the various aspects of myself to have their say, to feel the energy of each idea. She then gives me her feel for this moment. Ah, I feel how a nap is in store and a dreamy day of inner listening as some part is awaiting birth. The activities will wait, all coming to completion in their perfect time.
Today I sit with my hand on my belly, as I did before the birth of my first child, and follow the inward spiral to catch a glimpse of the wonder that is soon to be. I hear, holy days and I feel that this week, moving towards the solstice, to be just that. The seeds within our beings are asking for us to shine our light upon them as they awaken from a long slumber. It is time. We are about to blossom into our true beings. I came into this life to be here right now. Gratitude flows that I made it, along with all of you. We are here and it is time. I sit with this knowing and allow myself to drink it in. The wonder of it all.