Musings On This Rainy Morning

Lovely spider web created of beads and wire.

Lovely spider web created of beads and wire.

Sheets of rain falling straight from the heavens allowing me to keep my windows open  to enjoy the rush of energy. It is so enlivening! My mind feels a moment’s worry….we have had so much rain and many roads and homes are still in the process of being repaired. Caution cones dot the dirt roads warning of sections that have washed away.

Yet, there is this moment. My heart is allowing the joy of the moment, the sound on the roof, the negative ions that swirl and clear my apartment all savored with my cup of Mayan coffee that is rich and dark. I have raw organic cow’s milk with its inch and a half layer of cream on top from dear friends to blend with my coffee. I have toast made locally with organic stoneground flours, all grown nearby. I have my fairy lights around the room to brighten my spirit as the day is slowly lightening under the heavy cloud cover.

Our world is so full of things to cause concern, to worry and complain about. That is one view that we are bludgeoned with from the media. We are trained to keep our eyes on that view so that fear and guilt and pain are the vibrations we live in.

fullsizeoutput_53b2We have a choice to shift our viewing lens to another scene that plays out in the rain, in the comforting smell of coffee, in the notes of the birds announcing a new day. There is so much to be grateful for. When we move and live from the space of gratitude, we free ourselves to commune with the broader view. We know ourselves as divine beings, here to bring all of this cacophony into a harmonious note that sounds throughout the multiverse.

Every time that we tap into this space, this hum that sings within our cells, we are creating building blocks of joy. These are put together by all of us, to create heaven on earth. We are not taught this, that we are creator beings, holding the capacity to build the world of peace that we all want to live in. It is frequency, vibration and energy that creates. Our thoughts and words are powerful. Our beingness versus the doingness that we have been led to believe is what creates form.

It is time to shift our focus, to flip our lens to allow in more light. To look for the good in our hearts and radiate it outwards. We can bless this earth with each footstep, each smile, each moment of being in our joy.

fullsizeoutput_53b3Yesterday, that was stopping by the table set up on the roadside by six year old twins. They come from a family of entrepreneurs, an uncle who runs the largest organic vegetable farm here in Vermont, a mother who runs a landscaping business and an aunt who does wedding flowers. The girls decided to grow their own flowers from seed last spring and now they are picking bouquets and selling them as well as lemonade from their stand. I get the joy of purchasing their lovely flowers, enjoying their delight and my own as the bouquet graces my table.

Another way I focus my lens to the light is to spend time with my grandchildren. This is my morning with my three year old granddaughter. We play dress up, we dance to ballet videos, we have tea parties after baking tiny cakes and muffins to eat. She tells me stories that are rambling and rich in detail. Today we are headed to the next town over’s story time as they are having a watercolor artist to instruct the children. Last week, it was a visit from two Shetland ponies. The woman had asked my granddaughter if she would like to pet the ponies and she responded, “I am dog and pony hesitant.” The woman looked at me with wide eyes. Yes, that is my granddaughter….she knows how she feels and articulates it. After she observed the ponies for a time, she decided to join in and ended up using all the different brushes and combs to groom the ponies. She called them handsome boys as she gently tended to them.

Darkness and death, live side by side with light and life.

Darkness and death, live side by side with light and life.

Another morning, I have time with my almost one year old grandson who is a whirling dervish of activity, curious to pull and shake and taste this world in big bites. He leaves a trail behind him. Then there is my eight year old grandson who has moved an hour and a half away. I am learning the route which takes me through some lovely little towns and green hills. I travel to him once a week to engage in whatever is his latest interest. He is mechanical and loves to take things apart and show me how they work. He is a gentle heart, sensitive to everything and we share a deep attunement to the beauty of life.

Of late, I have been immersed in reading a series set in England during and between the two World Wars. Maisie Dobbs is a psychologist and private investigator, who uncovers much of the dark side of humanity. She is trained and guided by a wise mentor and taught the power of meditation and intuition to guide her in her quests. She knows the protective power of filling herself with the light of Source. I enjoy her personal story that winds through the horrors of war.

We are the spiders, spinning our webs of creation. Spin with joy!

We are the spiders, spinning our webs of creation. Spin with joy!

Why am I reading of darkness? We are called at times to take in the darkness, to feel it fully and bring it all to love. She demonstrates this by not making assumptions, not jumping to conclusions and holding light around all that she experiences. These stories teach me and offer examples that I can use in my life. We are here to learn and grow. We have grown through suffering and hardship in the past. Now, we are called to shed those hair shirts of old, and allow ourselves to grow through joy. It would seem the easiest of paths, yet to shed the path of suffering can be difficult. Opening to joy means to allow vulnerability, to walk with our hearts wide open. To allow the rains to wash our tears, to allow the path to pierce our hearts so that new notes can sing out.

Sing out your joy, take in all that is wrong in this world and transmute it through your heartlight into the gold of heaven that you wish to live. The fairy tales held truth. We are to spin the straw of this earth into the golden light of love. Let us create more each day!

 

Watching from an Expanded View

As I flew across the sea, I felt the energies of many meeting me. I felt some draw back in apprehension that I was to come again. I saw clearly how I challenge folks to be in their truth as I stand more firmly in mine. I felt the invitation from others and indeed had received a note asking me to come anchor my light in the area. I was surprised to see someone very dear to recoil from my energy and then saw the why of it. His partner has been running an unconscious energy that has been using his light. He has been stuck, not able to move forward,  disempowered. This pattern is familiar to me as I played out this giving away of my power for years with my former husband. And even more recently, a quick tour of it once again during those few days in Kauai that I wrote of as a final unwinding of that coil for me.

It is through the heart that loves so deeply that the hook gets set. The souls who show up to play this role for us do so out of their love, as it is not an easy role.   First order of business was to meet with this person and others close to him to bring the pattern to conscious awareness. We had all been feeling it for some time but now it felt time to speak to what we saw taking place on an energetic level. I found myself getting emotional and knew I had to have no attachment as to the outcome. The message was given by all and received in grace. The person left to find his way through it.

Next day, I spent supporting and participating in a women’s healing group. It was powerful as we practiced consciously pulling our own energy back to ourselves and clearing our fields before and after each session.  As we used sound healing and sacred geometry to facilitate our session, it felt like a play date. We had crystals, drums, rattles, decks of cards as well as crystal and Tibetan bowls to play with. I had asked to be in a triangle formation

These pictures are reminding me to take the expanded view on life!

as had another. She lay on the massage table and I elected to lay under it on the floor. I found myself in a sarcophagus going through an initiation of death and resurrection. I knew that death was an illusion and found that I could lie there in peace. Interesting. I had been reading about this initiation that Jesus and his community of Essences underwent as part of their Egyptian training.

Sunday I drove 3 hours each way to attend an opera performance in which my niece was starring. It was the first time that I saw her perform professionally and wanted to support her. I knew it meant contact with those who rejected me after the divorce. Truly I have released most biological relations except those with my children, so this was not a situation where there was a deep bond of understanding. I realize that most of them do not know what to make of me. Yet my higher self guided me to show up and so I did. It was delightful to see my niece give her gift to the world. What great joy it is to be doing what you love and sharing it! I also had the unexpected delight of seeing my nephews with their fiances and seeing the twining of their hearts’ love. The new babies are excited at these unions that they can come in through. It was also interesting to see folks’ energy in a way I have never seen before. I can read the energy and see how the outer behavior differs or aligns. Interesting.

The time in my car is always good for me for meditation. As I was driving, I felt a shudder of grief move through me. It was followed by a wave of loneliness. I breathed and traced it to its source. I felt that the person that I have spoken of above, had decided to leave the earth plane. Grief like a laser through me. It shook me to my core. I asked for more

all perspective as to which view we see

information, could not touch his energy field. I saw that the loneliness was the sense that I would be left to carry out our part of the plan for the new earth, on my own. I sensed that I was to be at peace with this and feel it all from that place of neutrality. We have been taught that death is the end rather than another doorway taken. We view it as bad when it is something that is part of the cycle of this life. I am feeling more and more the truth of neutrality as what appears wonderful can be devastating and what appears to have been the darkest experience, often turns out to be the greatest blessing. So, I felt the lesson of the sarcophagus with me as I reached for peace and calm. Later, I did speak with this dear heart by phone and so had a physical reassurance that he was ok but knew that I was being given a lesson. In the oneness, we are all connected. It does not start and stop, it is always there. It prompted me to do a round of releasing of all ties and cording from my space. To claim my sovereignty and pull back any ties that I had in others’ fields. I saw the image of me floating on a cloud and I was reaching out to detach all these fish hooks tied to lines that were connected to folks on the earth as well as old belief systems. I heard that it is time, time to let go and surrender all. We are walking into  a new landscape and truly we can take nothing and carry no one. What we can do is shine our light, to be a beacon and guide for others. It is time to let those seeking,  come to us. We must ask in this world of freewill for it to be given.

A bittersweet time as my deepest connections are falling away as I journey to the connection with my I AM Presence. It is the cycle of nature for us to outgrow our skins, to hatch from the cocoon. We travel together for a time until some inner prompting carries us to a new landscape. I can no longer be the anchor for others in the same way. My cheerleading, pushing, pulling, prodding days are over. The days of being the “wall” that others throw their issues at, knowing that the love is there, are finished. The wall is crumbling down and with it, I let go of the fatigue of all those years of not being seen for the love that I AM, by others as well as myself.  I am called inward to the solitude as are so many lightworkers at this time. We are facing our fears, strengthening our resolve and settling into the peace that will be needed in the times ahead. Every cell affirms that I have the training for this time and I am ready. I know that as I release those dearest to me,that they have the training and mastery to walk their paths also. Truly there is rejoicing in that knowing!