A recent trip to Buffalo, New York brought me new sights and wonders.
As we head towards the Winter Solstice here in the north, my body is shivering as the temperatures drop and darkness descends just after four p.m. There is a slight panic as the cold air flows in, the nights drop below freezing and I am greeted with frosty mornings. I have upgraded to plastic covered window inserts to stop the frost from forming inside my place. I am ordering battery operated candles to create a “hearth”. I miss having a wood stove to watch the flames dancing but am grateful for my heater that keeps me comfortable. I am adding more twinkle lights and look forward to getting my Christmas tree in a couple of weeks and stringing multicolored lights. I picked out my tree as I hiked around our family property the other day. My grandson loves marking and creating trails with his grandfather. He and I looked for, found and marked our Christmas trees. Best to do this before the snow falls so we get a good look at our choices. There are hundreds to choose from so it takes time. We mark our favorites and then go back and feel into the one that wants to come home with us, thanking all of them for their willingness to cut short their outdoor life to blaze light indoors and warm our hearts.
A last blaze of color as autumn exits.
There is a huge hickory tree on the top of the hill of the property. We recently had a sad event in our family and needed a place to bury this sadness in a ceremonial way. I saw the tree in my mind’s eye. It told me that it would and could hold “all the sadness and joy of the family”. Its message brought tears to my eyes. We will include a candle lit procession to it on the Solstice, to sing our love and joy with it. All of nature is desirous of being part of our journey. It supports us and thrives on our attention, just as we thrive on attention. It is so easy to send the plant and animal kingdom, the fairy and deva realms, our love. I forget this at times. The hemlock came in to remind me that I can turn to these nature spirits for support. How wondrous this is!
The energies of this time, find me depleted by mid-afternoon. I feel that every particle of my being has been used up. Often my day begins at three or four a.m. so as the darkness descends so early by the clock, my body reads it as night time and is ready for sleep. I am grateful for how I show up each day. I thank my body for doing its part as it has felt exhausting to simply be in these energetic streams. The top of my head was sore to the touch for a few days as I could feel the energy pouring through like a waterfall. Now, I sense a bit of a breather.
One of my daily hearts that occur in random ways. This was a hair on the tub, reminding me how I am loved and cherished.
The future is misty and I cannot make plans. I feel the call to deepen into this darkness and rest. I am savoring the family connections and letting go of what is not here. I know this is where I am to be for now. Spring holds movement and energy. I see a mass migration as we will feel a pull to our place on the earth. The place where our body and hearts dance in resonance with our Mother Earth. The time of being lone sentinels will come to an end and we will begin to gather in our love pods with our tribe. Oh, I have held this vision for so long. What rejoicing there will be when we can live it.
For now, there is gratitude for what is. Acceptance for all that shows up. Taking it all in and knowing that every shade of darkness can be transformed into the lovelight that is true. A friend’s son is going through a heightened time with his mental illness symptoms. I know his soul from lifetimes as llamas in the Himalayan mountains. I have felt drawn to dropping in a few times a day to sit with him in the core of the mountain. We are both in our burnt orange robes, sitting before a fire. We tend it with our hearts. Its effects flow out to the world. I know that I am there all the time, sending liquid lovelight. I am pulled there throughout the day, for moments, to consciously sit with him and know him as the wondrous being that he is. These times are a challenge for us all, but especially for those with mental illness. They are the sensitives who feel it all so profoundly. May all beings be supported and loved as we move to embodying our highest aspects here on earth.