Tag Archives: sexual energy

Our New Leadership Emerges

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This pink starfish was almost hidden until the sunlight revealed her. We are being called out by the sun to reveal our true colors.

This pink starfish was almost hidden until the sunlight revealed her. We are being called out by the sun to reveal our true colors.

As you know, I have recently received messages about stepping into my leadership role. I knew it did not look like our former understanding. I could sense it yet not define it. I did not have to as a fellow blogger, Brenda Hoffman did so perfectly! Here is the part that rang bells for me:

“You are the leader of one – and therefore, the leader of all. Displaying to others what is possible once you trust and love yourself. You are not better than others. Nor are you less than others. This is the Age to strut your stuff in any way you wish – but not expecting others to notice or care for they are strutting their stuff in their way…That is your road to glory. That is your joy. Believing in yourself enough to discover and live your life whether that meshes with others or not. “ http://lifetapestrycreations.wordpress.com/

I so love the way we are co-creating this new earth! I could feel the joy of living in a world of such magnificent diversity, where everyone fully embodied their truth, no longer sanding off the edges or putting on a mask over their essence. Allowing all of themselves to shine purely. Wow! Can’t you just feel that? There will be so much more dancing and song and color and play!

One of Gabriel's paintings with the orange delighting me.

One of Gabriel’s paintings with the orange delighting me.

I often get colors that want expression, it has recently shifted from magentas and violets to oranges of every hue. I want to eat orange food, sweet potatoes, salmon, oranges and squash of every kind, drink in orange lilies as they blossom on my table, I wrap orange scarves about my throat. I have four paintings with orange boldly expressing itself hanging on the living room walls at the moment. I just read Lisa Gawlas’ post about the color of February being orange!

“Sacral chakra energy.  The place where life emerges from.  Sexual energy.” http://lisagawlas.wordpress.com/2014/02/05/the-birth-of-the-new-must-allow-for-the-death-of-the-old/

I watched this elderly couple make their way down to the beach, holding hands while carrying a bottle of wine to share. They had arrived to watch the sunset. They spoke so eloquently to me of the tenderness of love.

I watched this elderly couple make their way down to the beach, holding hands while carrying a bottle of wine to share. They had arrived to watch the sunset. They spoke so eloquently to me of the tenderness of love.

This so fits with the union of the divine counterparts heating up as our fires of passion are coming online to birth the new life. My heart feels this excitement. Yet my body today is feeling flat and worn. I was awake for most of the night, not able to read or do anything but lie there in the dark with various currents running up and down, sweats and chills, head pressure and strange dreams  that I flowed in and out of. It has been an intense few days and my body is asking for stillness and quiet. The predicted rain has not come, blue skies and sunshine when I am craving mists and damp. The birds are calling me to sit outside and bask in it all. 11:11am…..time to go and be with what is.

The Bliss of Being with Myself

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Blue blue sky and tree magic added to the joy of today

I awoke this morning pondering if I wanted to join a friend for a women’s group about self-love. One part of me insisted that I “should” go (should being the trigger word that alerted me to look carefully) as I feel guided to offer a women workshop or two while I am here. Perhaps I would learn something useful, so says my mind. My body weighed in with its knowingness by feeling nauseous. OK! Definitely does not want to go anywhere. I played on both sides of this field as the time ticked away. Finally I texted my friend that I was passing on the invite. Freedom instantly felt!

My body loved moving slowly, savoring the day’s approach. I moved downstairs to the kitchen to see what might settle my stomach. Tea and toast seemed to be the ticket. The sun was shining in the front windows and the couch offered the optimum view. I was drawn to the vase of lilies that I had set in the middle of the table. Their fragrance wafted over me in a delightful way. I marveled at their beauty, the tiny dots of

deep pink on the petals, the furry bits on the inner part of the petal, standing up to the light, the way the pistil stood so bold and upright surrounded by stamens dancing in attendance. Must be fun to have all that male energy about just waiting for its chance to brush up against that stately pistil! The flower seemed alive with sexual energy! I felt enlivened by it, felt that I was drinking in its beauty, drifting on the air currents of sweet scent, dancing around that proud pistil! Wow, all this with the sun shining so brightly through the window, stroking me with its golden touch of light. Had I ever seen a lily before??? It felt like a new experience, one which I gave over every sense to. De-light-filled moments. I took up my pen and paper and did a sketch that made my heart sing. I had watched my son do one the day before with his left hand (he being right handed) as he broke a wrist bone and so is wearing a cast to his elbow. For an artist, a big handicap. Yet he made a beautiful drawing that is my present computer screen saver: http://gaberobertsart.com/2012/02/february-2012-desktop-wallpaper/

I lay back down after drawing, soaking in my sunbath and toning all kinds of new sounds.

I loved how the sun backlit the petals, making everything glow with pink light!

I had a blast with myself. So this is why I had no need to venture out for more learning. All was right here, everything that I needed was being gifted to me as I allowed myself to interact with the energies that presented themselves to me. Everything is energy that wants to be admired, appreciated, spoken to with loving words. All kinds of ideas for creative handiwork danced through my mind. I went and retrieved my sewing machine from years past, and planned how to set up a work space to create in. Oh, what fun! I want to weave and sew ribbons and fabrics into something beautiful. Tapestries have been a theme that has been haunting me for a time as I see ribbons from my heart, weaving, weaving across the planes. I see the glorious tapestries that our hearts are creating with one another and the Creator. I want to let my fingers out-picture some of that delight. It does not matter what I end up with, only the doing of it interests me.

I was struck on my walk by the dark humus that had fallen from the space hollowed out behind the bark on this tree. Mushrooms had been growing inside and were now decomposing at its base. Just beyond is the verdant green grass, so alive in the sunlight. It felt like me, having recently passed through an inner dark, moist journey into my fears, leaving me decomposed on the floor. Truly, I felt hollowed out, alive yet deep in the earth of my own being. Today, I am like the verdant grass, gleaming in my vibrancy and joy! You can dance through me! A friend called to tell me that I had been doing just that, dancing all around her with her acting as the maypole to my flower decked flying hair and form. She said I was laughing and smiling with abandon! What an affirmation for how my energy was moving through the day! I love this universe. I love the dark days, the light days and all the days in between. I am giving up putting a label on it and relaxing into the beingness of life itself. 

I am so grateful that I allowed the day to carry me where it willed. As well for the privilege of having a life where that is the open possibility for me each day. I welcomed in more of me today and found her to be such a nourishing addition to my many aspects. What I feared has been disarmed and I look forward to all the aspects of myself returning. For there are more of us waking up every day and we are able to accept the gift of one another’s light as it matches our own. We are finding our heart connections and feeling the relief and joy they bring. Everything blessed me today as I blessed every thing.